Mentor Fathers Overview

These commandments that I give you today are to upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. DEUTERONOMY 6:6-7 NIV

what it means to be a mentor

The dictionary defines a mentor as a trusted counselor or guide. A mentor is an individual, usually older, always more experienced, who helps and guides another individual’s development.

This guidance is done without thought of personal gain. Sam Mehaffie, in his book Every Man’s a Mentor, defines a mentor as “a man willing to serve; to share his life with a boy; to be a role model, an encourager, a listener. Mentoring helps to develop good character traits in a boy: fairness, decency, self-sacrifice, respect, loyalty, service, responsibility, integrity, unselfishness, honor, and self-esteem. And, when a godly man mentors a boy, he is helping to build Christian character into that boy, and hopefully will introduce him to Christ. A Christian mentor is a man reaching out to a boy to help him reach his God-given potential.”

Can you name a person who had a positive and enduring impact on your personal or professional life, someone whom you would like to imitate? If so, then you already know what a mentor looks and feels like.

As a Mentor Father to an abandoned boy, you have entered upon “holy ground” where God, your Heavenly Father, promises to be your Guide and Counselor. He will give you wisdom and understanding to impart to this young boy godly wisdom and life-changing strategies to overcome his difficult family situation. The Life Journey curriculum that Fathers in the Field has developed will greatly assist you in this journey with your Field Buddy as you introduce him to his Heavenly Father.

Support for Mentor Father

The Diaconate

The Diaconate is the most natural oversight body for Fathers in the Field in the local church. This ministry will challenge the Diaconate to take an active mercy role in the local community.

If your Diaconate is too focused on looking inward, then it will need to be awakened to the crying needs of single moms and abandoned boys in your community. Sadly, the stereotypical role of the deacon is oversight of finances, setting up chairs, passing out bulletins, taking up the offering and other property needs.

While these are necessary activities, they do not go to the biblical core rationale for the Office of the Diaconate. This office of the church was originally established as a servant ministry to take care of widows and orphans in their distress (Acts 6). Fathers in the Field is a wonderful way to renew the vision of the Deacons and return them to their biblical mandate.

HELPFUL HINTS The Church (Diaconate) should set up the Community Service Project for each of the Mentor Father/Field Buddy teams every month. If the Mentor Father does this on his own, the project may get done, but the Church and the congregation can not serve and grow along with the program. The Church needs to learn to reach out into the community and by doing so, they will see the needs and witness along with you to the community.

Women’s Ministry

Engaging the women in the church is a crucial aspect of Fathers in the Field. Due to the sensitive nature of a Mentor Father relating to a single mom, it is important to have a woman to liaise with the mom and guard against the potential pitfalls of impropriety. Not only that, but women also offer invaluable insights into the needs of a single mom and the challenges that she faces. They are “wired” differently than men and think of things that men would never come up with. One example is that our women’s Bible study collected money to give to the Field Buddies (under the Mentor Father’s supervision) to buy their mothers flowers for Mother’s Day.

HELPFUL HINTS Remember that, while the focus of Fathers in the Field is the abandoned boy, we must also find ways to minister to the whole family-the mom and other siblings. Be sure to personally welcome the mom and whole family by name. Perhaps the women could pick up the daughter(s) and take them some place special. Another idea is to give a gift certificate to the mom for Mother’s Day to get a manicure. The single moms are very proud and it will take a proactive mindset to engage the single mom and the other siblings of the family.

Thank You from Fathers in the Field

We are so grateful to you for your commitment to Christ and to abandoned boys. Thank you for listening to the heart of God in defending the cause of the fatherless. Please know your gift of TIME, by God’s grace, will change the life of an abandoned boy.

We offer up this prayer as our way of saying thank you.

Heavenly Father, thank you for this man who has heard the cry of the abandoned boy (as You have) and has not stood idly by ignoring that cry for help. Father, please bless him and his family as he invests his life into this young boy. May he reflect to his Field Buddy the love of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. May You give him the privilege of introducing this boy to a personal relationship with Your Son, Jesus Christ. Give him wisdom and grace as he models for this boy faith, fatherhood and forgiveness.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.